dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
