I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
