yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize