windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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