Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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