I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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