just come out here and I will go home with you...
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Randomize
