Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
