i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
