NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
