ugly people sure do ruin things
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
