making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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