He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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