found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
