Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
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