The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
