why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
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Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
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