Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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