i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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