just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Randomize
