Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
