i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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