Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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