no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Randomize
