so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
