you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
You should frame my arrest warrant.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Shame is for Republicans.
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