thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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