Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
