Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
