is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize