my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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