Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
