you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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