HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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