Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
