so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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