yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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