I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Randomize
