YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
You can't just leave with hair like that
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
