i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
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