never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize