I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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