Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
