I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
