So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
