i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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