Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
