I'm drive I can fine osifer
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize
