This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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