We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
